Books

Compassionate Conversations

How to speak and listen from the heart

The definitive guide to learning effective strategies for engaging in open and honest conversations about divisive issues.

When a conversation takes a turn into the sometimes uncomfortable and often contentious topics of race, religion, gender, sexuality, and politics, it can be difficult to know what to say or how to respond to someone you disagree with. Compassionate Conversations empowers us to transform these conversations into opportunities to bridge divides and mend relationships by providing the basic set of skills we need to be successful, including listening, reframing, and dealing with strong emotions. Addressing the long history of injury and pain for marginalized groups, the authors explore topics like intersectionality, power dynamics, and white fragility, allowing us to be more mindful in our conversations. Each chapter contains practices and conversation starters to help everyone feel more prepared to talk through polarizing issues, ultimately encouraging us to take risks, to understand and recognize our deep commonalities, to be willing to make mistakes, and to become more intimate with expressing our truths, as well as listening to those of others.

Releases May 19, 2020.  Pre-order at Amazon.

The Zen of You and Me

A Guide To Getting Along With Just About Anyone

How to deal with interpersonal conflict--from a Zen perspective.

The people who get under your skin the most can in fact be your greatest teachers.  It’s not a matter of overlooking  differences, as is often taught, but of regarding those difficult aspects of the relationship  with curiosity and compassion--for those very differences  offer a path to profound connection. Diane Hamilton’s practical, reality-based guide to living harmoniously with even your most irritating fellow humans—spouses, partners, colleagues, parents, children--shows that “getting along” is really a matter of discovering that our differences are nothing other than an expression of our even deeper shared unity.

Everything Is Workable

A Zen Approach To Conflict Resolution

Using mindfulness to work with and resolve the inevitable interpersonal conflicts that arise in all areas of life.

"Wonderfully engaging, perceptive, and wise."—William L. Ury, co-author of Getting to Yes

Conflict is going to be part of your life—as long as you have relationships, hold down a job, or have dry cleaning to be picked up. Bracing yourself against it won’t make it go away, but if you approach it consciously, you can navigate it in a way that not only honors everyone involved but makes it a source of deep insight as well. Seasoned mediator Diane Hamilton provides the skill set you need to engage conflict with wisdom and compassion, and even—sometimes—to be grateful for it. She teaches how to:

• Cultivate the mirror-like quality of attention as your base
• Identify the three personal conflict styles and determine which one you fall into
• Recognize the three fundamental perspectives in any conflict situation and learn to inhabit each of them
• Turn conflicts in families, at work, and in every kind of interpersonal relationship into win-win situations